<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>no more by the_forgotten_daydreamer</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22900840">no more</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_forgotten_daydreamer/pseuds/the_forgotten_daydreamer'>the_forgotten_daydreamer</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Voltron: Legendary Defender [10]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Voltron: Legendary Defender</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, BAMF Lance (Voltron), Blood and Injury, Blood and Violence, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Keith &amp; Shiro (Voltron) are Adoptive Siblings, Keith (Voltron) is a Good Boyfriend, Lance (Voltron) Angst, Lance (Voltron) Has PTSD - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Lance (Voltron) Speaks Spanish, Lance (Voltron) Whump, Lance Angst, Langst, M/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Whump, Worried Keith (Voltron), they/them pronouns for Pidge Gunderson</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-02-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 12:40:11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>5,104</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22900840</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_forgotten_daydreamer/pseuds/the_forgotten_daydreamer</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Lance's painful memories resurface from the abyss of his mind when Shiro raises his voice a bit too much. The team unexpectedly learns what it's like to get on Lance's wrong side; maybe their Blue Paladin isn't really the boy they thought he was.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Keith/Lance (Voltron), Lance &amp; Team Voltron, Lance &amp; Voltron Paladins</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Voltron: Legendary Defender [10]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1680511</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>500</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>no more</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Read the tags before starting this, please! Some things may be triggering and I don't want to hurt anybody.<br/>Also, I do not own VLD nor these characters, sadly.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Allura, I understand what you're saying, but we can't do it," Shiro breathed out, pinching the bridge of his nose and exhaling, "it's just too risky, I won't take any chances".</p><p>The Princess crossed her arms, standing a few steps in front of the man as the others observed, quietly.</p><p>"Please, Shiro. I have tried to find any possible solution, but this seems like the only idea that might actually work," she spoke calmly, "if the intel is correct, we could put an end to Zarkon's empire sooner than what we could do alone. I am not saying that it is entirely safe for us to go on this mission, but it's worth the risk"</p><p>"We are not risking our lives only to shorten the war of a few months, Princess! I am willing to do anything, but what you're suggesting is crazy. I won't let anybody go, and I'm personally not sacrificing myself either. We have no certainties and-"</p><p>"You fight in giant Lions made of quintessence and this is what you call crazy, that the intel may be incorrect!? We have been putting our lives in danger since the moment you stepped into the Castle. What is different now, Shiro?".</p><p>Pidge stepped forward, fixing their glasses while humming, "Well, I have to agree with Allura. We've been doing risky stuff since day one, and now we're even better at fighting, so the dangers are significantly less"</p><p>"Pidge, no. I won't change my mind on this"</p><p>"Why not?" Hunk asked, sincerely confused as he brought up a thick eyebrow, "I mean, I'm the first one who hates going on dangerous missions and all, but what Allura's suggesting is... Not too out of the ordinary, honestly"</p><p>"Yes, I do not understand this concern of yours either, lad!" Coran intervened, fiddling with his mustache, "I will be monitoring the situation from up here while you do your trick. It will be a hard mission, but I trust that you can make it like you did all of the other times. Allura will be more than ready to extract you from danger, were the situation to get too overwhelming to handle efficiently" he finished with an optimistic smile.</p><p>The Japanese man grunted, crossing his arms.</p><p>He was not going to let his team go on that mission, no way. Truthfully, they'd pulled more dangerous stunts, but the situation now wasn't optimal. <em> Scratch that </em>, it was terrible. Team Voltron had lost an infinite amount of fights, leaving the battlefield in retreat as cruisers kept damaging the Lions with new, unknown cannons- Pidge suspected that they were ion ones implemented with something explosive unknown to earthlings, judging from the readings they'd gathered.</p><p>And Shiro had no intention to see his friends come too, <em> too close to death </em> like they had done already. It was scary, the thought of one of them dying, the thought of one of them being permanently injured. Hunk had already suffered from a bad head injury, having thrown himself in front of the other Lions to shield them the first time that the deadly beam had been fired, and Pidge had broken more bones than the other team members had collectively during their journey when they’d been briefly captured by the enemies. Lance seemed more and more upset and twitchy, his uplift mood spent, and Keith had started to sleep-deprive himself <em> again </em>to train and study new plans on his own.</p><p>Coran was restless, trying to find what those cannons were and how to defeat the cruisers, and Allura kept moving the Castle to avoid attacks until further notice. But she knew, they all did, that they couldn't run anymore. It was time to act. And Shiro was aware of that as well, but he couldn't bring himself to act. Not yet.</p><p>"Shiro," Keith stepped forward, placing a hand on his step-brother's toned shoulder, "I understand your worries... Nobody wants to see a friend getting hurt, and you know that. But... But as Allura said already, we don't have a choice. This is war"</p><p>"Lance," the man called after sighing, making the Blue Paladin jump, "please, tell me that at least you agree with me".</p><p>Lance was sweating, hands rubbing against each other nervously as he stuttered, "I- I'm not sure if- I mean, I-".</p><p>Who was he to give advice, anyway? Nobody had ever relied on his words, he didn’t want them to start now in such a critical situation. </p><p>“Do not involve Lance as well,” the Princess spoke in a stern tone, placing herself in front of the Cuban and staring at the leader, “even if he agreed with you, which he <em> doesn’t </em>, you would be a minority. It’s final, Shiro”</p><p>“Honestly I-”</p><p>“Not now, Lance,” Shiro interrupted, and the boy shut his mouth, sighing silently, “Princess, this may be your Castle, but you do not pilot any Lion-”</p><p>“Oh! So what you are saying is that I am not worthy enough to speak on the matter?” she asked, sarcastically as she stepped a bit closer, still keeping the distance.</p><p>Shiro grunted, “I’m not saying that! I- why can’t you all understand!?”</p><p>“Because you are being dramatic, Shiro!” Hunk spat, shrugging, “honestly, this whole silly fight is holding us back and we’re wasting time”.</p><p>Keith nodded, and Pidge intervened, “Agreed, we should be out there fighting! This new plan has a 43% chance of succeeding-”</p><p>“That’s too low! Just- do you guys want to die!? Just say so, then!” Shiro shouted, red in his face, “look, if you want to go out there with your stupid plan and get yourself killed then go, I’m tired of playing the dad role when you don’t ever listen!”.</p><p>Lance swallowed the lump in his throat, heart beating incredibly fast and pounding in his chest and temples. This couldn’t be happening again to him. <em> No. </em></p><p>He was over this, over <em> him, </em>he’d solved the problem, he was safe now. Wasn’t he?</p><p>
  <em> it’s not him it’s not him it’s not him it’s not him it’s not him it’s not him it’s not him it’s not him it’s not him it’s not him it’s not him it’s not him it’s not- </em>
</p><p>“Did you just say ‘stupid plan’!? It’s the best one we’ve come up with since we joined the fight!” Hunk cut in, offended.</p><p>“Yeah, Shiro, you’re wrong! Admit it already. Take a deep breath and let’s go-”</p><p>“Keith, you should be the first one to shut the fuck up on this! God, you’re the one who gets us into trouble every time!”</p><p>“Excuse you!?”</p><p>“Guys! Calm down, would you?” Coran spoke, his accented voice uncharacteristically stern, “bickering will not get us anywhere! Moderate your tones, all of you, okay!?”</p><p>“Coran, stay out of this…”</p><p>“Don’t you dare-” Allura interrupted the team leader, gasping, “Coran has the right to speak and intervene as much as he wants and you better respect him, or you will face the consequences!”</p><p>The man snorted and the scar on his nose wrinkled up; he crossed his arms, muttering, “What, you’ll call the royal guards? Oh, wait...”</p><p>“Shiro!!” Keith yelled, eyes wide as the others stood astonished and shocked, “man, you’ve gone too far now”</p><p>“Did I? Everybody seems to be forgetting that I was the one who started all of this Voltron crap by getting abducted by fucking aliens and being experimented on. I think I have the right to say what I want, Keith” he growled, eyes sharp.</p><p>“I can’t believe you right now,” Pidge muttered angrily, their fists tight at their sides, “I understand that your head has been fucked up by the Galra, but you’re being ridiculous and utterly shitty, dude”</p><p>“Yeah, you definitely crossed the line there, bud...” Hunk added, shaking his head and crossing his arms.</p><p>Everybody stared at the man, though a pair of eyes was set elsewhere. Lance’s blue orbs stared at his boots, flashes of what he’d gone through, of what he’d <em> done </em>passing before his eyes rapidly.</p><p>His throat was dry, mind absent.</p><p>
  <em> Cálmate, Lance. Everything’s fine. Everything’s fine! He’s not- </em>
</p><p>“Fine, do whatever the fuck you want. I’m out”</p><p>“Shiro...” Allura called, grabbing his wrist not tightly but enough to hold him back, “please, let’s discuss this-”</p><p>“We already have!” he yelled, making everybody but Lance jump, as he yanked his hand away, leaving it in midair as the robotic fist tightened defensively. He was about to turn around and leave like he intended to, but a well delivered hit to his face stopped him dead on his tracks; Lance ran into him violently as he screamed like an animal, knocking Shiro over and putting himself above the man.</p><p>
  <em> What the-! </em>
</p><p>“Do not fucking touch her!!” Lance yelled, pinning the man down on the floor as he held his collar tightly, knuckles turning whiter than Keith’s complexion. </p><p>The man stared, baffled as his nose bled uncontrollably, “L-Lance?”.</p><p>The boy’s pupils were pinpoint, bloodshot eyes staring intensely at the man below him, teeth gritted as he spoke. Lance brought the shirt collar up and put his head closer, noses brushing, ”Did you not learn the lesson!? Did you not understand what I told you last time, huh!?” he questioned, yelling his lungs out as he delivered another punch to the helpless man’s scarred face. The smirk on the Blue Paladin’s face was ominous, an ugly snarl tore from his mouth, “acabaré contigo, y cuando lo haga..!” he said, much to everybody’s confusion, as he pulled the beyard out.</p><p>Until Pidge, who’d taken Spanish class only to make their friend happy, breathed out in shock and spoke shakily, “Lance, no! He- he wants to kill him”.</p><p>And <em> that </em>put the others, especially Keith, in action. </p><p>"No, hey, Lance!" the Japanese boy yelled, scared and incredulous as he approached the two, “Lance, put that away right now!”</p><p>Pidge stepped forward too, "Yeah, Lance, what’s wrong with you?"</p><p>“Coran, retrieve a sedative-” </p><p>“On it, Princess!” the man replied, running away as Allura approached Lance slowly from the back, Hunk following her close.</p><p>“I thought that the message was clear enough, but what could I expect from a stupid piece of shit like you!?” Lance questioned, slamming Shiro’s head against the floor again, and the man hissed in pain, squinting as the room spun, “L-Lance, please, I don’t know what you’re talking about..!”.</p><p>Lance’s expression darkened, eyes thin and deadly. The grip loosened- Shiro would have breathed out in relief if he wasn’t so terrified and confused now- and the hands went on the sides of his own head, gripping at the chocolate hair and actually ripping a few ones off. </p><p>“You… You think you can fuck with me again, huh? That I’m still the ‘pathetic’, ‘worthless’ kid I was back then!?” a tear escaped the boy’s left eye, and everything stopped because nobody had ever seen Lance so <em> broken.  </em></p><p>“You hurt us...” he huffed out an hysterical sob that resembled a laugh, “you did this to us every goddamn day!” he screamed, spitting in the man’s face.</p><p>“Lance, buddy, I- I have no idea what-”</p><p>“Stop it!!” he screamed, grabbing Shiro throat and beginning to tighten the hold as the others yelled but didn’t dare to move, “you ruined our family, you ruined <em> me </em>! Oh, I should have killed you sooner, you fucking bastard!” he screamed, eyes wide. His fat tears dripped onto the helpless man’s struck face, and the grip tightened further.</p><p>Shiro was turning red, eyes critically puffed and throat hurting, “Pl- please- L-Lance...” the words died on his tongue as the teen raised the beyard, turned into a knife- and nobody had seen that before- and brought it down.</p><p>The leader closed his eyes, bracing himself for the pain.</p><p>But it didn’t come. Instead, something- someone?- dropped on him in a heap.</p><p>When Shiro opened one eye tentatively, he found Lance’s still form sprawled on him, beyard back to its original form scattered on the floor. </p><p>“It worked...” Coran sighed, removing the needle from Lance’s exposed neck, as Keith dragged him away from Shiro and held him tight, muttering reassuring words in his ears, whispers to the others.</p><p>Allura ran to Shiro’s side, getting him into a sitting position against her chest and making him release the breath he had unknowingly held for so long. Oxygen <em> burned </em>his lungs, and he coughed, a hand covering his lips as he tried to adjust to the fresh air rushing in his squeezed lungs.</p><p>“There, there. Breathe deep, nice and slow… You’re alright...” the woman instructed, patting the Black Paladin’s back as it shook and trembled.</p><p>“What… What just happened?” Hunk asked after a brief moment of silence, “I… I never saw him this… Feral...”</p><p>“Me neither,” Pidge muttered, sitting on the floor next to their friend, “how long till he wakes up?”</p><p>“A few doboshes at most. I’ve given him a light dose, not knowing how human bodies react to Altean medicine...” the gingerman explained, expression grim as he crouched next to Lance and felt his pulse, “at least he’s calmed down now”.</p><p>Keith ran a soothing hand through Lance’s damp bangs and dried his tears, sighing. He then raised his eyes and looked at his step-brother, who’d just regained his breath: his face was bruised, mouth and nose stained in thick blood. </p><p>“Are you okay?”</p><p>The man nodded, holding his nose, “‘s fine. I… What happened?”</p><p>“I… I have no idea…”.</p><p>Just then, Lance stirred and Keith’s grip tightened instinctively.</p><p>“Lance..?” he called, voice low and soothing as he gestured for the others to step back, not wanting to overwhelm his boyfriend, “you okay..?”.</p><p>The Cuban nodded, sitting up on his own without using Keith’s chest to support him up, “What… I feel like I got hit by a car...” he shuddered, palms pressed against his eyes, “what happened..?” he wondered out loud, looking around.</p><p>“We… We were hoping that you could tell us that, Lance,” Allura filled the silence, eyes warm and cautious. Lance’s gaze fell upon Shiro’s crouching form, and he gasped.</p><p>Oh.</p><p>
  <em> Oh no, no no no no. </em>
</p><p>Had he-? Did he-? No, no way, he couldn’t-</p><p>“Lance? Are you still with us?” Hunk asked gently.</p><p>“Did I- Shiro, did I do th-that?”.</p><p>Silence followed. </p><p>
  <em> ¡Dios! </em>
</p><p>"No… No… I'm- I'm so sorry... Shit, what..? I- I don't know what has gotten into me... I'm..." he rambled, clutching at his face, eyes shut tight.</p><p>Worry churned Keith's guts, as he caressed Lance's hands, prying them away, "Lance? Baby, are you alright?"</p><p>"No!" Lance yelled, a sobs wrecking his thin form, "I'm sorry, Sh-Shiro. I-".</p><p>The man's nose kept oozing blood, and Lance's stomach flipped.</p><p>He'd done that.</p><p>He was becoming like <em> him. </em> </p><p>"No, no, I- Shiro! I'm sorry, I..." Lance sobbed hysterically, gasping for air, “fuck, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry!".</p><p>He felt like he was suffocating, lungs unable to hold the air, skin hot and sweaty, bangs plastered to his face that was wet in tears.</p><p>Coran cleared his throat, murmuring, "Perhaps a trip to the medbay for him too would be optimal"</p><p>"No, no, I-" Lance's words got cut off as he bent forward with a strangled, pained cry, freeing his hands from Keith's grip and clutching at his head once again. </p><p>Memories of his father beating his mom and him dizzied Lance as they flashed rapidly before his eyes. Tears started flooding again, and those, mixed with snot, dropped onto the floor loudly as he sobbed, "mierda- I'm sorry, I...".</p><p>Nobody dared to move. Nobody understood <em> what </em>was going on, if not that, whatever it was, it was something terrifying.</p><p>Hunk shook his head, trying to lure the bad thoughts away, and approached the team leader, offering a hand, "Shiro, let's get you to a pod, huh?".</p><p>The man didn’t move an inch, "No, I... I can wait. I want to understand what's happening to him first". Shiro was worried. Worried that he had awoken something so deep and dark. Worried that he’d done that with someone like Lance.</p><p>Keith breathed out shakily, and tried again, "Lance, baby… What happened?".</p><p>Silence followed, as Lance didn’t move from his semi-bowing position.</p><p>"Please, we can't help you until you let us know… I beg you" Keith pleaded, voice desperate.</p><p>Was it mind-control? Was it some drug that Lance had taken?</p><p>"He yelled" Lance murmured, voice barely a whisper. They didn’t know if they’d heard right, but thankfully Lance repeated it again, voice slightly louder, "Shiro… He… He yelled. I... I didn't... I don't like th-that" he sobbed, going into a sitting position, butt resting on the heels of his armor boots. His gaze was still low as he let his arms lay limply at his sides.</p><p>Pidge spoke, gently, "You... You don't like Shiro yelling?".</p><p>Lance shook his head, "He… He was too close to A-Allura and I thought-"</p><p><em> Dios, </em>he couldn’t bring himself to say it.</p><p>"...You thought I was gonna beat her?" the leader filled in, eyes wide.</p><p>He had scared Lance. He had terrified him. He had crossed the line, just like the others had said. <em> They… they were right… </em></p><p>Lance shuddered hard, whimpering as he covered his ears and nodded rapidly, face scrunched up in pain. <em> No uses esa palabra, por favor... </em></p><p>"M-my fa-father used t' beat m-" the words died on his tongue, an hysterical sob wrecking his shivering body as he wailed, "he’d beat mamá and I..."</p><p>"Oh, Lance..."</p><p>"He w-would y-yell in our f-faces before-" another whimper escaped, as Lance grabbed his own body, willing for it to stop.</p><p>He felt pathetic and worthless, just like his father used to call him. Not noticing, he started rocking back and forth, sliding the legs from under his body and going into a sitting position. Keith cursed because all he could do was watch. </p><p>God, he felt so useless.</p><p>“Lance, baby… Calm down…” </p><p>"He’d yell and h-hit us w-with objects, an-and I thought Shiro-" he managed between one hiccup and another.</p><p>The realization washed over them all like a bucket filled to the brim with freezing water. </p><p>So Lance’s father had… He had...</p><p>Shiro let go of his nose to move a bloodied hand and reach Lance, "I... Lance, I would never-" before the hand could touch the boy’s shoulder, he flinched back, violently, and Shiro backed away immediately.</p><p>"I know! I- I know... I'm s-so sorry..." he cried helplessly, and Keith couldn't bear it anymore. He gently grabbed Lance, despite the flinches, and held him in his warm arms; Lance kept trembling in Keith's tight hold,  but the Red Paladin didn’t let go, and whispered softly in his hair, cradling it delicately.</p><p>"F-fuck, perdonen. Sh-shit... I'm s-sorry, g-guys!! I-"</p><p>“Shh, it’s alright now… You’re here with us, you’re okay, baby...” Keith shushed, tone soothing and calm, while the others kept, observing the heart-wrecking scene of their friend still rocking his body to calm down, Keith following his movements as he hugged him.</p><p>Lance’s breathing eventually evened out, his hyperventilation decreasing and turning into occasional hiccups and sobs, tears ceasing to fall.</p><p>And it took more time than Lance wanted to admit, honestly. But he couldn’t unsee his father’s fists descending on his mother’s crying face, he couldn’t unsee his thirteen years old self as he tried to pry that monster away from the beaten woman, he couldn’t unsee his father grabbing his hair and yanking his head up, smashing it against the wall repeatedly.</p><p>He whimpered, curling further in Keith’s hold, seeking warmth and reassurance. The Japanese boy never stopped to caress his hair, fingers massaging the scalp, the other hand holding Lance’s for dear life.</p><p>“Shiro… Get in a pod, please,” he spoke quietly not to startle Lance out of his daze, looking at the team leader, “seeing you like this won’t help him...”.</p><p>“Keith’s right,” Pidge intervened, helping the man up, “we’ll talk about everything later. You and Lance need to rest now” they smiled tenderly.</p><p>Hunk helped to get Shiro to the infirmary, and Coran followed them to ascertain the man’s condition.</p><p>The Princess went ahead to prepare Keith and Lance’s room so that the Cuban could rest until he was ready to talk, and he gently picked his boyfriend up, carrying him slowly to their room. He eased his unmoving body onto the mattress and undressed him without touching him too much, for fear that he could scare or trigger him again. Lance’s spacy gaze soon disappeared behind his heavy eyelids, eased into a restless slumber. Keith just sat there and waited, his mind racing. </p><p>-</p><p>Three vargas later, Shiro exited the healing pod, his nose fixed and his concussion reduced to a dull headache; Hunk immediately wrapped a blanket around his shoulders and guided him to a cot, where Coran examined him and declared him fully healed.</p><p>Still, the man’s mind was not: he couldn’t forget Lance’s cold, deadly gaze upon him, he couldn’t forget how he’d almost stabbed him. And it was his fault. Shiro had pushed Lance too far. And that… That was a hard thing to do. Impossible, he had thought until that day.</p><p>“How is he?”</p><p>“Lance? He’s… He’s in his room. Tried to make him sleep, but that’s out of the question for now” Pidge explained grimly, cleaning their glasses with the hem of the shirt.</p><p>“Keith’s with him. Don’t worry, man” Hunk specified, and Shiro smiled on reflex because it was exactly his next question.</p><p>Coran hummed, preparing the pod that Shiro had used to set it offline again, “The lad’s quite shook up, it will take time to recover. Still, I have… Questions.” he muttered, leaving the work behind, “Lance said that his father used to hit him, and his mother too, correct?”</p><p>“Yeah..?”</p><p>“But… Number Three stated multiple times that he has siblings as well. Why… I mean, this is going to sound incredibly mean and insensitive, but why would his father spare them? And why not him, too?”</p><p>“That’s… That’s a good question, Coran” Hunk said, “we could ask him, but we probably shouldn’t...”</p><p>“Definitely not. Lance has… He’s gone through a traumatic experience, evidently enough. We can talk about what happened without digging too far, or it will cause him too much stress and trigger his PTSD again” Shiro stated, getting up from the cot. </p><p>“Wait, pity- what?”</p><p>“PTSD, that is Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. It’s a serious issue people go through after a very, very traumatic experience,” Pidge explained to Coran, and then looked at Shiro, “you think Lance has it?”</p><p>“I know he does. I… I saw myself in his eyes. That… Fear and anger, mixed with a desire to just make it all stop… I understand him.” the man fumbled, eyes low, “Shit, I’m ashamed for how I acted and I want to apologise to you all. It… I must have been pretty nasty if Lance summoned a new knife, huh?” he tried to joke, and the others exhaled weakly, “I shall go and say sorry to the others as well”.</p><p>“We’re coming with you, Shiro”</p><p>“Yeah,” Pidge smiled, walking next to Hunk, “we have to find out more about Lance’s father so that we know what to do when we go back on Earth!”</p><p>“I agree to that sentiment” Coran nodded as he exited the infirmary, followed by the others.</p><p>-</p><p>When they found Lance in the main room, where they used to play games and relax together, they were actually surprised that Keith had, somehow, managed to get him out of the bedroom so soon.</p><p>Their friend was swaddled in a weighted blanket, his face being the only thing left out, and Keith sat next to him, an arm wrapped around his shoulders. Allura stepped in the room from the other door, eyeing the four newcomers, surprised.</p><p>Shiro cleared his throat, looking at Lance, “H-Hey, Sharpshooter. How… How are you?”</p><p>“Shiro..?” Lance spoke, turning around and following his friends with his gaze until they were all sat on the couch, “are you okay!?”</p><p>“I’m fine, kiddo. What about you-”</p><p>“I’m so, so sorry, Shiro. Guys, I- I really don’t understand what I did nor why, I-”</p><p>“Calm down,” Keith spoke, rubbing circles on his boyfriend’s back, “don’t send yourself into a panic attack again, please. It’s all good now, okay?”</p><p>“Y-yes, sorry”</p><p>“And stop apologising, please. This is not your fault. We just need to talk, if that is okay for you” Allura cut in, eyes kind.</p><p>“I- okay, okay. What… What do I..?”.</p><p>Hunk, the one who had known Lance since his childhood, was the first one to speak, voice low and words carefully chosen, “How long has your father done those things to you and to your mom?”</p><p>“I… I don’t know. It started when… When I was eight, I think. It went on until a few months after I joined the Garrison...”</p><p>“After?” Shiro questioned, eyebrows scrunched up in confusion.</p><p>“Y-yeah. I would go back and visit during holidays and… He… I mean, he didn’t care… He just...” Lance forced himself to breathe deeply, hand clutching at his chest tightly.</p><p>"So… The bruises you used to have-"</p><p>"Him, yes" he interrupted Hunk’s question.</p><p>"Lance... I'm sorry, I... God, I wish I could have done... Anything to help you out!" Pidge gasped, angry, “I was clueless...”</p><p>"Me too, man. Fuck, if I'd found out sooner... I should have guessed... Lance, I'm sorry"</p><p>"’S okay, guys. D-don't worry. It's o-over" he managed a tiny smile, still gasping for air "he w-won't hurt u-us anymore".</p><p>"Of course not. We'll do anything to protect you from him, baby..." Keith cut in, and Allura nodded vigorously, “Exactly. And your mother as well, of course” she smiled.</p><p>When Lance’s ominous smirk, the one they’d seen before, showed on his face, they all stopped breathing. </p><p>
  <em> Not again... </em>
</p><p>"That won't b-be necessary. He- he can't hurt an-anyone now" he huffed out a dry laugh, eyes low.</p><p>Coran gingerly voiced everybody’s question, tone calm despite being scared, "Is... Is your father in prison, Lance?"</p><p>"....No. But... But he'll n-never come close to us again un-until I live".</p><p>Keith’s hand stopped caressing as he withdrew it, gaze questioning and fearing for the answer, “Lance… What did you do?”</p><p>“I…”</p><p>“Did you kill him?”</p><p>“I wish. I wish I did.” Lance replied, smiling disturbingly, eyes thin and lost, “I should have done it. I should’ve plunged the knife further into his guts..!”</p><p>“Lance-”</p><p>“Then- then it would have been over. It still isn’t, and it’s my fault. If… If he finds out I’m out here and not with mamá, he may come back and..! I- I have to go back!”</p><p>“Lance...”</p><p>“Keith, please, you don’t understand. If… If he knows that I can’t hurt him again, he will go to mamá and finish her! Please, you have to let me go back!!”</p><p>“We will go back, Lance. Not… Not now… We-”</p><p>“Please, please please please-” he rambled, gripping at his hair again, “if he hurts mamá I’ll have to kill him!”</p><p>“That- that won’t be necessary”</p><p>“Yes, Shiro, it will! God! He… The police won’t do anything to him, and I’ll be left alone in the world with him and-”</p><p>“What about your siblings?” Pidge spat, not able to hold back anymore, “why didn’t he hurt them?”</p><p>“They… Mamá sent them away, and the two of us were the last ones to leave Cuba. I stayed back because… Because I needed to protect her, to wait until we had enough money to travel at the same time. We worked so hard, but we had to wait more than a whole year after my siblings left before we could join them. Tickets were too expensive and my father was- he was spending more money than what mamá and I could earn together”</p><p>“You… You used to work as a kid?”</p><p>“After school, yes… I delivered things with my bike, sometimes did my classmate’s homework for a few pesos… I also trimmed the grass for my neighbours and cleaned their cars. Mamá had real jobs, I was just… Helping”</p><p>“You were just a child...” Allura reassured, eyes watery, “no kid should be forced to do that”</p><p>“I was happy to help! I- I still managed to get good grades, so… So I wasn’t having it bad. It was… It was okay… But… But when he… When my father used to come home drunk and… And beat us… I would just wish to die, honestly… And mamá wanted to get me pills or whatever, but… But they cost money that we couldn’t waste, not on… Not on me. When… When I received the scholarship for the Garrison, mamá made me accept, and I started studying… I hated being away, but… But thanks to the scholarship and some extra odd jobs I did, I had enough money to buy us decent phones and telephone credit, so that she could keep me posted on what… On what my father did.” Lance stopped to breathe, drying a tear he didn’t know he’d shed.</p><p>“Baby...”</p><p>“For the first months of academy, my domicile was still in Cuba, legally speaking… We were only a few months of work away from having enough money to make mamá come to the US. One day, during holidays, I went back thanks to a free-ride I was offered by the Garrison, made for students who needed to reach other parts of the country, and… And I found my father-” Lance choked, throat dry and tight, “he was on her, holding a- a broken bottle dripping b-blood… Her blood… I… I thought she was d-dead. So I…”</p><p>“You don’t have to tell us if you do not want to” Coran spoke, kind eyes scanning Lance’s suddenly pale face.</p><p>“No, ‘s okay… I… I don’t remember much… There was… Blood. Lots of it… I… I grabbed a knife and… I stabbed him. Twice.” Lance blurted out, hiding his face, “He… he never touched us again after that. Never showed up at all… I… I’m lucky he didn’t report m-me to the authorities… I… I could have lost everything… I…” he looked up, blurred eyes watering rapidly, “I’m so sorry, g-guys… But he won't h-hurt mamá and I again. No... No more”.</p><p>They were all baffled. Lance’s unexpected confession made them realize how much they’d underestimated the Blue Paladin, such a gentle, selfless soul. And he was willing to commit murder to protect them.</p><p>It was <em> disturbing </em>. </p><p>Appreciated, of course, but utterly upsetting. It wasn’t normal, and it didn’t take anything else to realize it. </p><p>They were going to need help for Lance, and they were also going to find the <em> monster </em>who had done that.</p><p>He was going to pay.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>1) feels good to get this off my chest, it's been in my drafts for months!<br/>2) why do I always make Lance's dad so nasty!? In canon he seems like a chill and loving dude... Sorry, man!<br/>3) Lance says that his father- I headcanoned him as Tulio, by the way- uses to call him pathetic and useless. These words are the same ones in one of the chapters of my "29 day Whump challenge" collection. Find where and you'll get a virtual cookie uwu !<br/>4) one day I'll have the team beat the shit out of Tulio, I promise... On a different story, though, as this one's done.<br/>5) I hate the finale but I had no idea on how to decently conclude this.<br/>-<br/>Now that I've written some BAMF Lance, I can go back to torturing him on the "29 day Whump challenge", all Langst-centric. Check it out if you haven't, please. 14 indipendent chapters are already up!<br/>Thanks for reading :)</p><p>DON'T READ AND RUN!!! Leave comments and kudos if you enjoyed this, please, and come say hi on my tumblr @theforgottendaydreamer</p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>